Something The Cat Dragged In!

Do you have bad breath? Can you stand people with bad breath? Well, I can't and let me tell you a little experience I had with this thing called bad breath yesterday. I was on the verge of passing out because of bad breath yesterday.

I had an appointment yesterday with one of our more important clients. They're this big huge conglomerate and we're in the midst of doing their company profile. Both my boss and me are handling the same account, she's basically dealing more with the higher ups and I'm basically dealing more with the lower ranks, which is just fine by me. The higher ups (whom I'm met before) can be a bunch of arrogant know it alls at times.

Anyway, this profile project is in a little mess at the moment, especially with compiling all the data needed for each individual subsidiary and stuff like that. So, yesterday I had to meet one of the 'higher ups' and see him about getting a little more information that I could work with. This guy is one of the many Vice-Presidents of the company and as far as I'm concerned one of the nicer 'higher ups' in the organization.

So, there I was having my meeting with him in his room and not long into the meeting, I start getting whiffs of this peculiar pungent smell. At first I couldn't identify it and thought maybe I stepped on dog or cat poo on the way in. I discreetly check the bottom of both my shoes. I mean, these things happen you know. It has happened to me a few times before. But thankfully, both my shoes are in the clear. But that rancid smell is still around on an on/off basis.

Ok, maybe it's my shirt or something, I thought. You know how sometimes when your clothes don't really dry out properly after being washed and you get this unpleasant mildewy kind smell? Well, I thought maybe it was that. But then I've been in my shirt for hours already and would have notice if the smell was from my shirt. But just to be sure, I once again discreetly try to smell my shirt. Trust me, it wasn't easy trying to smell your own shirt while having a meeting with someone face to face. But it wasn't my shirt, all I could smell was my perfume.

Ok, the smell is definitely not coming from me. So, I start to look at the surroundings of the guys room but there's nothing that would cause it. Then it finally hit me. The smell only appeared everytime this VP opened his mouth to say something. Oh my god, it finally dawns on me that his VP has bad breath! And he has a tendency of breathing heavily when he speaks and he's sitting right smack in front of me with the air conditioning blowing away from behind him. Take a guess who's getting the brunt of this attack! Yeah, you got that right, me!

Ok, now, let me tell you something. The smell of this guys breath was akin to something the cat dragged in after it was left out to decompose for close to a year! Ok, maybe that was a little too much, but it sure smelt that way. And the worse thing was there was no way to maneuver and escape the brunt of his 'attack'. I just had to sit there and keep on smiling and try to stop myself from fainting and falling over. I could have told him about it, but hey, how in heaven's name do you even begin to tell a VP of a huge establishment that his breath stank big time!

'Oh, by the Mr. VP, your breath smell like dead fish, can you refrain from breathing in my face?'

I don't think that would have sat to well with him now, right? And there really was no other diplomatic way for me to tell him. I mean if he was my buddy, than that wouldn't pose any problems. But he's a Vice-President for goodness sake! How do you tell a VP of a company, especially one that is one of our biggest accounts that he stinks? Well, his breath anyway. So there I was, having to sit through the meeting and stomach his breath and it wasn't a short one cos this guy is pretty long winded.

'And so are you, Nick!'

Ok, ok, so I am a little long winded too, so sue me already! I was honestly on the verge of passing out. Everytime he spoke, I had to brace myself to face the barrage of the smell. I did my best to hold my breath and not breathe throughout the meeting but by the time the meeting was over, I think I was turning slightly green in the face cos just before I left his room, he asked me if I was feeling alright. He said I looked a little woozy.

'No of course I wasn't feeling alright Mr. VP. I was trying hard not to faint from inhaling all your bad air!'

But of course I didn't tell him that, I just smiled and told him I'm suffering from a headache and I'll be okay. And the moment I left his room and was in fresh air, I greedily sucked in lungfuls of that wonderfully dirty polluted city air and it was way better than his breath I tell you! I really couldn't believe a VP of a respectable establishment would have bad breath. I mean really bad breath. I'm not saying I have the world's most nicest smelling breath but this guy was bad with a capital B-A-D! The worse thing is I'm going to need to see him again soon. I think I'll bring along my own gas mask, maybe he'll just get the message on his own. Right now I pity his staff ... LOL!

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