Mood Swings

My brain these days is a blob of utter confusion. There are too many things happening at any one time in my life right now that just trying to get through the day is pretty stressful. And it gets even worse at work. I seriously have no mood to work and am perpetually looking at my wrist watch waiting for time to head on home.

And it's also affecting my blogging as well. I can't think of anything decent to post no matter how long I sit here. I'm totally uninspired and unmotivated these days. I'm sure there has to be more to life than this. Unfortunately I haven't discovered it yet or for some reason it's avoiding me.

It's not a nice feeling walking around aimlessly half the time. Trying to put up a cheery front takes huge chunks of effort from me. Just working up a smile is like trying to climb a sheer faced wall. By nature I'm a happy go lucky kind of person and normally nothing can affect me to the point of me being listless. One only needs to ask my best friends, all two of them, and they'd easily tell you that hardly anything affects me for too long.

But these days, things affect me pretty easily. I tend to think or worry about stuff more and more and it's getting harder and harder for me to get out of these doldrums. Maybe I need a nice long break (something which I cannot afford right now), something to recharge the batteries. Maybe I need some new acne medication. Maybe I need a new change of scenery, something to stimulate the mind. Maybe I just need to chill out a bit and not be such a worry wart. A lot of maybe's but with no answers in sight ... siggghhh!

I'm thankful that I have a wife that understands me (well, I hope she does anyway) and knows what to do when I come home all moody and grouchy. Besides I'm always happy when I get home anyway. All that aside, I seriously need to do something about my moods these days. It's really draining the very life out of me. Maybe the coming long weekend will give me a chance to take a break and sort things out. Maybe September will be a better month for me, I don't know but I'm keeping my toes and fingers crossed.

But till then you're all just going to have to put up with my boring and lacklustre postings until I can sort myself out, which won't be too long I hope.
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