Judging from the title above, I'm sure you know I hate my neighbour. He really is a pain in the rear! Yesterday he complained to my mom that leaves from my mango tree was falling into his porch.
Let me start from the beginning. This Neanderthal moved into the house next to me a few months back. This was after the stupid renovations he did to the house before he moved in which gave us countless months of noise while the renovation works were going on (even on weekends!).
I have this nice huge leafy mango tree in my compound. It provides a nice shady place and it does wonders for the environment (ok la, that was cheap .. hehe). When that Neanderthal moved in he started complaining that the some of the branches and leaves were in his compound so I got the tree trimmed since I'm such a nice person to live next to (ok, ok, I'll quit with the cheap shots already ...hehehe ... ). That took away almost 50% of my shade. Never mind, I said.
Then after a month or so, he called the local municipal council and complained to them that he was afraid the tree would fall into his yard (now, this is a tree that's been standing firm thru thunderstorms, tsunamis and typhoons for close to 12 years now, mind you). Even though the council told that Neanderthal the tree looked fine to them and even though I was pissed, I compromised again and got the tree cut one more time. And I mean really cut. I lost practically 95% of the shade, the tree was totally leafless.
It's been about two months now and of cos the leaves have started to grow a little. Yesterday we experienced this huge thunderstorm in my area and after the rain, that Neanderthal complained to my mom that the rain and wind blew some leaves into his porch again!. Hello, we just experienced a thunderstorm and the last time I checked, winds were included in thunderstorms! I absolutely cannot believe him. What does he expect me to do, everytime it rains or when it gets windy, that I stand next to my tree and catch all the falling leaves???? Gee, how stupid can one person be??? I can't control which direction the wind is going to blow. I'm not God, for goodness sake. I seriously feel like slapping his stupid face but then I do have respect for the old and the stupid!
Does anyone know the direct line to God? Maybe I can give God a call and ask him (or is God a her .. hehe) to stop sending so much wind blowing my way, especially in that Neanderthals direction! Boy, this must be the longest post I've ever written, see what rage does to me. It makes me write and write and write ... hehehehe ...
Neanderthal? Hairy, beer swilling, trucker cap, white singlet and jeans wearing type belcher?
ReplyDeleteFeel sorry for you mate. It sucks. You're pretty patient I must say. Maybe your neighbour is bored and needs to bitch about something.
I hope I don't jinx things but the house next door to mine is up for sale. It should be made legal for me to screen potential buyers.
He's not bored dude, he's a nut case. He's perpetually cleaning his porch. He should live inside a glass dome or something where dust, dirt and especially leaves won't touch his precious porch :)
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, God can't be so bad as to let you have a neighbour from hell too :) But if you do, my sympathies. LOL!
... H'es a cleanliness freak? omg. Then just ignore the guy. He'll never be happy. Leave a box outside your door with "Complaints from [neighbour's name] - will be looked into when I'm [happy, bored, crazy.]" such a nutcase.
ReplyDeleteLOL. Bobo, now that's an idea. I think I'll try that. Knowing the nut case, he would probably leave a complaint!
ReplyDeleteMan, you must be pissed huh:) Ignore the no life old man. I guess he gets high when he cleans his porch! Throw more leaves into his compound... hahaha
ReplyDeleteSweetiepie, How to ignore him, every time I walk outside the house I see his (waving my fist in the air) sickening face! Maybe if I pray hard enuf, the tree might just fall on his head or something ... Muahahahahaha!
ReplyDeleteLOL, funny post! Not the situation though, guess you just have to tough it out for now, doesn't look like he's gonna budge from his stand any time soon! :)
ReplyDeletewow i would be highly pissed off too...you would think people would welcome the extra shade...well good luck in dealing with this dumba$$
ReplyDeleteWhoa, stupid neighbour who don't have anything better to do than complaining about few leaves getting on their yard.. i mean does it really matters THAT MUCH?!
ReplyDeleteMarzie - He's never gonna budge la cos he actually bought the house so I'm stuck with a Neanderthal for a neighbour. Sighhhhhhhhhh ....
ReplyDeleterainqueen21 - Yeah, this is actually the first time I know of anyone not wanting shade! I guess the desert would suit him just fine :) Thanx for dropping by.
Chin12 - Yup, he really has nothing better to do. He gets up early every morning and washes his porch, maybe I should get him to do mine since he's so free, ya. LOL! Btw, thanx for visiting :)
LOL..I'm sorry for your neighbor troubles. He sounds like a real joy!! I like Bobo's idea though, that is great!
ReplyDeleteReally though, I think you should let your tree grow. You have tried to accomodate this moron and it seems like the only thing that will make him happy is if you cut the tree down. But I wouldn't do that..Just let your grow, nice big and bushy!!
Yeah Diamond, I like Bobo's idea too. LOL. I'm actually gonna let that tree grow again, just like you suggested. And I hope all the leaves fall into his yard :)
ReplyDeleteHmm ... we both have some pretty unbearable neighbours, but I think that yours would be harder to ignore.
ReplyDeleteThe complaints box might backfire on you, but it would be an interesting experiment. Perhaps after a day or two you'd have enough scraps of paper from your neighbour for another post :P
Jason, yeah, your neighbour is probably some distant relative of my Neanderthal neighbour! You may be right about that complain box. I've decided to let the tree grow again and irritate the hell out of him, cruel I know, but it's sure gonna be fun. LOL!
ReplyDeleteAlamak! Sorry you have that kind of neighbor. I have stupid neighbors over here in KL as well. They tend to dump their rubbish on MY side of bin and OUTSIDE of the bin! Stray dogs would come and bite the whole plastic bags, leaving a huge mess in front of my house! Damnit, they don't wanna throw in their own bin and they wanna mess up mine. Grrrrrr!
ReplyDeleteI feel you, bro. LOL!
LOL! I can relate to this story. I have something similar here living at the 1st floor. I will share my stories soon.
ReplyDeleteI think all these crazy neighbors are somehow related!
Cindy - gosh, my neighbour is a cleanliness freak and yours is filthy scum. LOL! I know how that must feel, stray dogs scavenging through your garbage and leaving a trail of stinking mess ... Argghh! Just throw the garbage back into his house la. LOL.
ReplyDeleteAnn - I'll be looking forward to hearing your monster neighbour stories. LOL. They probably all have the same mother!
Try 1-800-GOD but call after seven please the lines are usually tied up before that! Or you can sms him too but he takes awhile to answer! His email is GODBWITHU.heaven.com but the mailmox is full and your mail will only get bounced back! Personnaly I just kneel down and pray and usually he answers right away! :)
ReplyDeleteAdrian, thanx for the the number, I was beginning to wonder if anyone was ever going to give me God's number. LOL! I wonder if kneeling down and praying for some lightning to strike that no good Neanderthal in the you know where would be entertained by God :)
ReplyDeletefind the seeds for the biggest tree in the world and throw the whole bag over to his lawn. pray that they will grow. as for God, the last I heard He stopped by in Keningau :P
ReplyDeleteMrbadak, I would love to do what you suggested, but the nutcase doesn't have grass in his lawn! He covered it completely in tiles, now you see my predicament? :) He's a totally un-environmentally friendly person! Oh, that's why my prayers not answered yet, when is God coming back here :)
ReplyDeleteI have neighbors from hell too...they are so bad it makes you fear for the future of the human race! Ah, one day we will get our property out in the country and leave these bad neighbors behind! Too bad we will miss the good ones tho - will have to have them out for barbeques! ;0
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ReplyDeleteI've this stupid neighbor next to my house who also planted a mango tree & quite tall. Many of the branches have crossed my boundary & very often the old leaves will felt on my yard. The stupid don't even border to try to collect her "rubbish" from my yard & NEVER apologize to for this inconvenience to me for collecting her shit from my yard. Not mention trimming the tree like what our friend above did.
DeleteI believe, although we are neighbor, not everybody like experience what I did here. As such, please be responsible & pay respect to your neighbor.