The Gods Must Love Me!

I'm in a foul mood tonight! And I mean a really foul mood! Sometimes you just have to be real careful with what you say cos you don't know just when one of those gods with their perverse and sadistic sick sense of humour may be listening in to your conversation!

Let me start from the beginning. Don't worry, this won't be one of my long winded posts cos I am so not in the mood to write too much today (but don't hold me to that okay?). This afternoon when wifey and me went grocery shopping at our favourite nearby hypermarket, I decided that I wanted to cook some burgers for dinner tonight.

'Urmm, grocery shopping in the afternoon? Shouldn't you be at work?'

Ok, don't you start with me now. I was bumming off for a bit, so sue me! Besides it's easier to grocery shop when everyone is working. No crowds and all that, you know. So, as I was saying before being rudely interrupted by that still unknown interloper, I wanted to have burgers for dinner. So I bought a pack of chicken patties and cheese and the usual stuff that would be needed for my burger frying session. Yes, I fry a pretty mean burger and the boys and wifey just love it (at least I hope so anyway).

After sending wifey back home and heading to the office to continue what's left of the work day, I keep on thinking of the burger frying session I'm going to be having later at night. My appetite was going into over drive just imagining the lusciously yummy burgers. The moment work was done, I quickly head back home. It was still a little too early to get the burgers done cos I reach home about 6.20pm and we normally have dinner close to 8.00pm so I decide to wash the bathroom room first to work up and even bigger appetite. Besides the bathroom was looking a little too slimy for my liking.

After finally cleaning up the bathroom and taking my bath, I head down to the kitchen to prepare the ingredients and start start my burger frying session. Wifey and the boys place their orders:

'3 burgers with cheese and ketchup, hold the onions please'

Soon, the place is permeating with the smell of burgers being fried. It was exactly at that moment that I turn to wifey and jokingly say that we're probably going to need to get a new cylinder of cooking gas soon. We've had the current cylinder since just after Christmas and the flame was getting a little orangy already, a sure sign that a replacement was needed. And just as I finish making wifey and the boys burger and start to make mine, the blooming flames just snuffs itself out! This will teach me to next time keep my big freaking mouth shut!

At first I thought maybe I accidentally turned it off. So I hit the switch again and nothing happens. No flame, no smell of gas, nothing, zilch, nada, zero! Ok, you must remember that by this time I was absolutely hungry and have been craving for home made burgers since noon.

'Why me?' I look up and shriek.

'What did I do to deserve this?' I ask to no one in particular.

'I've been a good little boy all day!' I plead.

'I'm so hungry and I so need that burger!' I shout.

And just where am I going to find a gas cylinder at 8.00pm at night? The gas man is off for the day and the only option was to actually physically lug that empty cylinder and drive to the shop down the road and buy one! With no other option, I grudgingly drag the empty cylinder and head out to the shop. At this point you could physically see I was totally pissed already. Even wifey could see the rage in my face. She knows me, I hate it when I have my mind set on doing something and things go wrong.

And as always, when you're mad and boiling, there will always be that one or two more things that will happen to piss you off more. On the way to the shop, which is really a short drive, I was stuck behind this car that took its own sweet time to move from the road junction to the main road. Then when I reached the shop, I got stuck behind another car waiting to pick someone up and couldn't care less about the traffic he was holding up behind him. And then I couldn't find a parking space nearby and had to carry that empty cylinder all the way to the shop. And then the bloody same thing happens to me on the way back.

I tell you, there really is someone up there who must just love giving me grieve! After finally reaching home and actually getting down to frying my burgers, what would normally have taken me at most half an hour to do, took me nearly 2 hours in total. That was one of the most stressful burger frying sessions I've ever had in my life. And it totally fouled up my mood for the whole evening. I just sat there glumly and watched TV without a peep from me all night long. Well, at least until Ugly Betty started, then I was laughing again ... LOL!

I hope whoever you are up there, you're satisfied now! I hope I've provided enough sadistic amusement to last you a lifetime. Now go pick on someone else for a change, okay? Well, I guess now that I've let out some steam, I can check out one of those condo hotel sites and start planning for my holiday cos after the night I just had, I could do with one!

Oh and you guys didn't really believe me when I said I wasn't going to write a long winded post now did you? LOL!