Wednesday, February 20, 2008

I Give Up!

In case you're wondering if it's blogging that I've given up, don't be too alarmed cos the day I give up blogging will be a very cold day in hell. What's I've given up on is my next door neighbour. I've totally had it with their attitude. I cannot even begin to fathom how people, especially your own neighbours can be such pains in the behind. They've gone from bad to worse to totally crazy.

Let me start from the top. Most of you who have been following my neighbourly problems would know that I'm sandwiched between two neighbours from hell. The one on the left which I've labeled as the Neanderthal and the one on my right which I have not labeled just yet. As of today, the right neighbour is now officially known as that senile old hag!

Now this senile old hag is the one that I complained about once before who thinks the common fence that separates each house belongs exclusively to her. She exclusively hogs the fence and whenever she hears wifey coming out to hang the laundry she'll run out and put old rags there to deprive wifey of space to hang her laundry. Never mind, we've gotten over that by getting our own place to dry the laundry.

A few days ago, my mom hung the mop on that fence to dry in the sun, seeing as how by some miracle the fence wasn't hogged by her. This would not have taken all day, maybe an hour or so since the sun was blazing hot that day. But you know what that senile old hag did? She just took the mop off the fence and threw it down on the floor. And then when my mom asked her why did she do that, she said it was bringing her bad luck!

Now, that mop was on that fence for only a few minutes and it was bringing her bad luck already? Whoa, what a powerful mop that was. I suppose those old rags she hangs there brings her excellent luck? The thing is she had the cheek to just throw the mop off the fence. And if I'm not mistaken my mom probably hung the mop in the corner of the fence out of sight. She is one arrogant senile old hag that I have just about had enough of! And that wasn't the first time. Once before, when wifey hung her laundry there, she just took this piece of wood and placed it over the clean laundry hanging there!

And while she was telling my mom that the mop was bringing her bad luck and all that, she also said that my car was also dirtying her place! Yes, dirtying her place. WTF! Every morning before I head to work, I'll always warm up my car for a bit. It's been something that I've done for as long as I've been driving. And this old senile hag was saying that smoke from my exhaust was polluting her air and making her place dirty!

Siggghhhh, how stupid can she be? First of all, that 'smoke' that she apparently refers to that is coming out of my exhaust is just early morning condensation evaporating from the exhaust and poses no harm whatsoever and it dissipates immediately the moment it comes out. I cannot see how that can dirty her bloody house. It's not like my car belches smoke into her house or anything. I was really pissed when I heard that. Maybe she should live in a glass dome with her own artificially controlled environment or something.

My mom is normally friendly and patient with the neighbours but this time I think she was really pissed. The moment wifey came down, my mom went to her and complained about that senile old hag (I just love calling her a senile old hag) and wifey in turn told me all about it. I was mad as hell. I wanted my revenge on that senile old hag. Did I mention I just love calling her a senile old hag? No? Well, I do ... LOL! But wifey told me that if we did extract revenge on her, then we'd be stooping to her level and we'd be no better than her. It's best just to ignore her completely and that would irk her even more. Damn, I hate it when wifey is right ... LOL!

So, I'm just going to ignore her and keep on doing what I've been doing. I'm not going to change my style just to accommodate some imbecile. I'll warm up my car every morning like I always do. I'm going to hang things on that fence when it's free of old rags. And if she doesn't like well, hurray for her! But I just couldn't help bitching about it here. It makes me feel so much better now that I've 'let' it out of my system :) Somebody up there must not like me very much to put me in between two annoying neighbours. Please god, make the earth swallow both of them up or get some aliens to kidnap them or something and give me some nice new, good, decent, likable, neighbours for a change. I'll be a good little boy, I promise :D


  1. hi nick,
    I can only say all the best of luck to u! is harder to shake a bad neighbour than to buy a good book from paylessbook unless u wan to consider moving away which is not an acceptable solution. And ur wife is rite, lowering urself to their level is a no-no... LUCK!

  2. err..... what a.... senile old hag!! i can not find better words. Some people can not find a better thing to do than spoiling people's days by their attitude! Amazing how they think they are always right!

    And well...your wife is right but then i also hate it because revenge sounds so sweet!

  3. hahahaha.. well nick, I'm sure you and wifey can find a way to subtly get back at her without EXACTLY lowering yourself to her level.

    I think with a devious mind like yours, I bet you can come up with something. Little things that can drive that ol' lady up the wall. LOL!

    All the best with the war of the neighbours! :)

  4. Jen - Thanks a lot!!! LOL! Well, I could always pray hard that the ground will open up and they drop into the bowels of the earth, right? LOL!

    I think I need more patience than luck right now.

  5. Lena - You don't have to find better words, that senile old hag title works just fine ... LOL!

    I'd love to extract revenge on them. I've got a few ideas running in my head but I'll refrain from doing it just yet ... LOL!

  6. Shemah - A devious mind? Me? Whatever gave you that idea ... LMAO! You bet I have a devious mind :D

    Unfortunately I don't know how to be moderately devious and do little things that will drive her nuts.

    I guess I'm just going to have to put up with it for now, that is until I totally lose my temper then Mr. Devious mind will start cranking out some ideas ... LOL!

  7. Poor Nick, getting so pissed off with the neighbour on the right now...

    Hope you are better now after voicing out on your blog...

    Take Care :)

  8. Janice - I'm 'blessed' with having 2 'wonderful' neighbours! The god of neighbours must not like me very much ... LOL!

    Yeah, I feel a whole lot better now that I've let it out here ... LOL!

  9. Oh no, sorry to hear that. I fear having neighbours of hell! I am very lucky now because the building where I live is almost empty (just the fourth floor flat is being used and we live on the first floor).

    When buying our own place we will definitely consider who the neighbours are. Of course, circumstances may change and so could the neighbours... :(

    I hope we will be lucky. Good luck with those difficult guys!

  10. OMG senile old hag is just a perfect name for her! If I were you, I'd just throw those old rags to her floor and say the same thing back hehe.. but that would make me stoop to her level as well haha.. but hey, maybe you can leave your car on longer than usual so as to irritate her more? But like everyone says, ignore that hag is the best way to go.. good luck! ;)

  11. That's the only thing with this house buying lark, you can't choose your neighbours!
    Let's pray the earth swallows them up one day?! But who would you moan about if that happened?!

  12. There are always ways to handle people like this. What I'd suggest is check your ammo before you start exacting revenge. By "ammo", I mean go to your local city hall and see who's land the fence is actually on. If it's on your land, get a photocopy of the land survey and keep it ready for the next time the old hag opens her mouth. Once she learns that it doesn't belong to her and that you have 100% lawful access to it, then you can threaten her with trespassing should she ever put her dirty old rags on there.

    Sure, that would be "stooping to her level", but if you can't beat them, join them.

    Or ... when in Rome ....

    I'm sure we could both go on and on with sayings that would make your sweet revenge seem even more just than this action could possibly make it :)

  13. I'm just tickled pink at listening to you get really angry. That's the spirit Nick. You go tiger.

  14. dood. I feel your pain. I once had TERRIBLE neighbors. I moved. I changed my son's school and MOVED. It was THAT bad.


    Hope things work out.

  15. LOL... wow, I know this was a rant, but it was absolutely hilarious.

    And maybe those dirty rags ARE bringing her luck.

    But I know about bad neighbors I have some now. Good luck.

    And nice blog, I'll be back! :-D

  16. So did the mop once belong to Harry just wondering why it was so magical that it gave her bad luck. hehe!

  17. Your wife is right.No point stooping to their level. You have your right to warm up the car and hang laundry. We have neighbourly spats here in Singapore too, and ugly ones have even made it to the newspapers on a regular basis.

  18. La delirante - Wow, you're lucky. I envy you. I wish my neighbour would move or something.

    Definitely look into your surroundings and neighbours when you decide to buy your own place. It makes a lot of difference in the long run ...

  19. Jaq - I'm really tempted to give her a taste of her own medicine. I am a vengeful person! LOL! But I'm keeping my temper in check for now and will just ignore her.

    That idea of warming up my car a little longer sounds like a mighty fine one ... LOL!

  20. The world according to me - I have to agree with you about not being able to chose our neighbours but how I wish I did though, that would make life a lot better.

    And you're right, if the earth swallowed her up, I'd have no one to moan about ... LOL!

  21. Jason - Well said :D But the thing about houses here is the fence is actually what separates one house from the other and it doesn't belong to one specific house. Like I said, it's a common kinda fence so the City Hall idea just won't work. But it's a good one though :D

    Well, if she bugs my family a little more, I'm inclined to do the 'when in Rome ...' bit. That'll learn her! LOL!

  22. Gypsy - LOL! You don't wanna see me when I'm angry. I can be such a pain ... hehehe ...

    And one of these days, she really is going to get my Lou Ferigno 'Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry ...' routine ... LOL!

  23. Meleah - You actually moved??? And here I thought my neighbours were horrible little critters ... But then, that doesn't sound like such a bad idea ... LOL!

  24. Jillian - First of all, welcome to my blog.

    Glad you found my rantings hilarious ... LOL! You could be right about those rags you know, maybe they are lucky. I think I'll go steal them this afternoon, I could use some good luck ... LOL!

    And hope to see you around more ...

  25. Tammy - LMAO! Harry Potter's mop, eh? I never thought of it that way.

    I think I'll go check and see if it does indeed have magical properties ... LOL!

  26. BT - I guess neighbourly spats are unavoidable when you live so close to each other but the least she could do is fight about something practical!

    But then, what spat has been practical to begin with, right?

    And if this appears in the papers you'll know the earth opened up and swallowed her and it's become big news ... LOL!

  27. Oh poor soul... but I must admit your entry some how tickled me hehe...good luck with your 'fav' neighbour! ;p

  28. Nick - would you like me to kick their butts? 'Cuz for you, I would.

  29. Aunty J - LOL! I'm glad you guys can get a good laugh out of this ... hehehe ... I'm going to need all the luck I can get though!

  30. AB - LOL! That is a tempting offer! They do deserve a swift kick in rear, that's for sure.

  31. I think it's better to have aliens as neighbours than those neanderthal and senile old hag haha! Those neighbours of yours must be envious about some things you have that they don't have lol!

  32. Aiyo!!!!! Your neighbour is making me angry la!! How old is she again?? Good to see u holding ur ground, wonder what will she do next, keep us updated! ;)

  33. Nick, I think you should take AB up on her offer, she's going to need to release some tension from that big project she's doing.


    Take up a collection and issue a contract. You can't be the only one she's annoying!

  34. Ok... Just for good measure, I just wished your neighbors the crotch fleas of a thousand dirty camels. :-)

  35. Nick! First of all, i am so sorry for you and ur family, need to endure such crazy and senile people. I like the way u describe her! hahaha!

    Secondly, if i were u, I will declare war with her!! Make her life miserable too!

    But then again, it is always better to forgive and forget, than making enemy and hate someone! Make ur life happier too! on top of that, the more u dont care about her, it will make her angry more! That will bring some satisfaction in u I hope!

    Anyway, good luck and god be with u! :)

  36. Marlene - It would be better to even have monkeys as neighbours! LOL!

    I don't think it's jealousy, I don't really have much. I think it's just plain selfishness and arrogance!

  37. LOL Marzie - If you can get angry just reading it, imagine me, having to face them every single day. I feel like puking when I see her face. Don't worry, I will definitely keep everyone updated on their antics ... LOL!

  38. MP - Gee, I like you idea of issuing a contract ... LOL! And I'm tempted to get AB to kick their behinds! LOL!

  39. Corrina - thank you very much for the wishes. If I see her scratching like crazy, I'' know those fleas have arrived ... LOL!

  40. Rose - I'm cursed with getting lousy neighbours!

    I would love to declare war but like I said, that would be stooping to her level. So, I'll just ignore her and keep doing the things I normally do and like you said, that will drive her crazy ... LOL!

  41. OMG just reading this post makes me angry! WTF is wrong with that woman?! (I assume she's a woman, unless of course, she went for a sex change..) You know what? I kept thinking about this "pee in a bucket" thing. I have the urge to tell you to "accidentally" pour the bucket of pee unto her floor. She's so irritating lah!!!!

    And I thought my neighbor is worse. You know, that woman who lives upstairs? She feeds the wild pigeon everyday - and the rice dropped ALL OVER my front porch! >:(

    If the Earth ever opens up and swallow that neighbor of yours, do tell! I need a carbon copy of the exact prayer you said! lol

  42. Cindy - She is a woman, an ugly old senile had at that ... LOL!

    Hey, that's a good idea. Maybe I could get my two boys to pee through the fence at night when they're sleeping so it will stick the place or something. And I thought I was devious ... LOL!

    Thank god I don't have anyone living above me or I think I'll really go banana's la!

    Don't worry Cindy, you'll be the first I sent the prayer to if it works ... LOL!

  43. wow! is she for real? maybe irritating you is her only source of entertainment.. :-)

  44. You sure have very weird neighbours there... hehehehe..... This is an interesting blog. I think I'll visit here more often:D

  45. Sting - Yeah, like can't she go see a movie or something for entertainment instead of harassing me ... LOL!

  46. 3 eggs - First of all welcome to Anything Goes!

    Weird is too nice a name for my neighbours. LOL!

    Do drop by again anytime.

  47. Sorryt o hear that!I am totally piss off with this plp.I think she might did alot of bad things to plp.That's why she kept thinking other plp curse her or trying to make her bad luck.Be patient and see when is the best time to call the cops.:)

  48. Sweetiepie - You're probably right. Well, now I really wish bad luck upon her everyday ... LOL!

    If I had to call the cops, then I think the situation would really have gotten out of hand! LOL!

  49. Oh my gosh!! why do we have to endure with this kind of people??!!!I geram!!

    I used to rent a place and have the same crazy neighbor!!! I can't hang my mop to dry on the fence but she can hang her son socks and yes RUGS to dry..and then she will go all the way yapping on and on about my golden retriever saying that he will take her son socks and chew on it..and would "strongly" advice us to cage him!!

    My goldie so kesian..sometimes i balik rumah he will be wet because this nice neighbor of mine would "shower" him voluntarily

    And yes, she even when up to saying we made her front yard dirty because we clean our front yard every morning!!! WTF???!!!

    Urg...these people irks me!!!

  50. Emelda - First of all, welcome to my blog.

    Looks like we have the same kind of moronic neighbours. You know what, if it was me, I'd have given the socks to my dog to 'chew' on ... LOL! But then again, you never know where that socks has been.

    I'd have given her hell if she did spray my dog with water (not that I have a dog la). That is really being a little too much, isn't it?

    Hope to see you pop by more often ...


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